What Do Black Men Think of Black Women’s Natural Hair?

Do you feel that black men ( in general) are becoming more accepting of natural hair on black women?

There is a stereotype that most black women with natural hair tend to date white men. I don’t feel this is true, but I can understand where the stereotype comes from. If we look at the music videos, men’s magazines and other forms of media we mostly see black women depicted with long straight hair. Even in magazines or media that are supposedly marketed at black men we see this.

The fact that black women are continuously bombarded with an image that implies that only straight hair is beautiful creates a wharped perception of beauty for both black men and black women. In recent years, it seems more black women are steering away from putting chemicals on their hair. Many women are rocking locs, twists or afros. However, many women are not and that is fine.
I do not believe in judging someone for their hair choice. I think the most important thing is that black women understand that they CAN wear their hair in its natural state if they choose to and there’s nothing wrong with it. However, I’ve heard people state many times that black men either seem to dislike natural hair or pressure women to wear their hair in a certain natural style, like only wear it in locs for example. I do not believe this is true for most black men, perhaps some. Most of the time when I see black women with natural hair, I do see them with black men. But then again, I also see black women with natural hair with non-black men. The door swings both ways. You’re going to see black men who dont’ like natural hair, black men who do like/prefer natural hair and black men who really do not care.

I think the biggest thing is to start showing black women with a wide range of hairstyle, particularly in ‘black media’ Put black women with afros or kinky twists in music videos and start depicting them in a desirable light. This will open people’s eyes to the beauty of natural black hair.

Do you think black men are becoming more accepting of black women’s natural hair? Do you think society in general is becoming more accepting or no?

 

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What Do Black Men Think of Black Women’s Natural Hair?

37 thoughts on “What Do Black Men Think of Black Women’s Natural Hair?

  1. Jessica says:

    That’s an interesting question and post! I think product marketers have always been more open to natural hair on Black women, but in the last few years there has been an increase in the number of natural haired Black women in the media. Probably due to American exposure to British television and their almost exclusive use of natural haired Black women.

    Popular BBC shows like Doctor Who, Torchwood, Being Human and Misfits have and continue to use a LOT of natural haired Black women in their casting. But American media and marketers also know that many BM do not like natural hair on Black women (some are boorishly vocal about it) so marketing to BM will use a relaxed model or non-BW altogether. A lot of Black male recording artists use only non-BW in their videos.

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    1. Paul "Jamal" Boanton says:

      I have always loved women with natural hair. The black barbie doll, over processed look is so played out.

      Like

  2. Jules says:

    I think it is grand that more and more black women are embracing their authentic selves. I think conscious and discerning black men are very much ok with natural hair, and in many cases prefer it. Those who are still trapped in the matrix do not like it. Black women have always controlled their own image regardless of what society deemed fit. The Afro however is a hairstyle that has political overtones so I am not sure if society will come to a place where Afros will be accepted in corporate and elite setting. Otherwise, I think society has embraced natural coiffure.

    I also think it is an utter indignity for black women to wear the hair of other women. I despise it to the core of my being to see black women wearing ‘human hair’ and raving about the quality of these various hairs. Cancer patients and women suffering from long term alopecia are exempt, but the average woman who has her own hair should really take a deep look into why she need to wear the hair of women from other races.

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    1. Tina Clarkson says:

      I personally do not wear weave, and definately see where your coming from. At the same time however, black women are not the only women wearing weaves or the “hair of women from other races,” and just based on my personal experience I don’t intrepret that when these women from non-black groups wear weave, they are even partially as chastised as black women who do so. I am well aware that the hair politics that have surrounded black women and hair carry a very different meaning than it would for women from other groups, but I also think that we can give black women who wear weave a brake and stop deeming this action as something devastatingly negative. I don’t know that that is actually helping.

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      1. Jules says:

        Sorry for the late reply, was just perusing the site and feeling sad that no new posts.

        Anyways, if you read carefully you can see nowhere in my response did I say black women should not wear weaves. I do not care if black women wear weaves or wigs as there are numerous synthetic hair options available for women. I will however not change my stance that I do not support black women wearing the hair of ‘other’ women. The reason I feel this way is that the majority of the human hair on the market is from Asia and last thing I checked whether East, or South East Asian the vast majority of these women consider themselves superior to black women. I have too much pride to wear the hair of women who think that I am inferior to them because I am black. I know that black women are not the only women that wear weaves, but I have yet to see any ‘other’ woman weave natural black afro hair into their heads. They may wear an afro wig which is made from synthetic hair, but I doubt any would take a donation of hair from Wanda.

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    2. Lovelei says:

      Well I agree. But my daughter wore her hair out to School and was told her hair was acceptable for school maybe that’s how we get brainwash being told our hair is unacceptable at an early age SMFH u be the judge mind u she is only 10 yrs old

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  3. Bek says:

    I think that each person has their own particular taste. It’s a situation where some will say it’s beautiful while others will hate it. It’s hard to say whether or not all will love/hate natural hair. Everyone’s struggle with it is unique as well. For some, it’s offensive and brings up images of slavery, and for others they may still hold to the idea that WW’s hairstyles (straight hair) are more professional, and that you can’t get a job with an afro, etc. With that said, however, I have to agree with India Arie in that, BW are not their hair (song, I Am Not My Hair). There’s so much more to people than what’s on their head. Frankly, what’s IN their heads is way more important. So whether or not BM like BW’s natural hair…be a good woman.

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  4. Teddy says:

    Sure, but to this European male straightened hair signals that something IN the head it is on is pretty messed up. A big Afro may not look that professional in some professions, sure, but there’s nothing wrong there with a TWA.

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  5. Howie T says:

    As a Black man i make sure i compliment natural black womens hair.
    But there is the black women who is super sexy superfine, no one on this earth who being real can deny her. Look at Aaliyah.
    We have a lot to appreciate about the black woman before we gt to her hair just saying it dont matter. Only just realising to appreciate whats on the insiden basically you dont need it. We aint seen all the styles yet and im betting you black women aint even scratched the imagination of what you can do, not freaky just, just plain ole real

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    1. thank you for the comment, yes what is inside a person is far more important than what hairstyle they have. I think that its important thought that more black women understand that they CAN if they choose embrace and wear their hair in a natural state. I also think its important to emphasize that caring for your natural hair is more important that caring for a weave because you can have healthy hair and still straighten it or wear a weave, but you do need to know atleast how to CARE for your own natural hair and hair shouldn’t be put above your own health.

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  6. joecwilk@yahoo.com says:

    I believe most Black men could careless. What a woman’s hair looks like. It’s more about how attractive a woman is, and how she feels about herself. If she feels beautiful. She will radiate that to other people.

    I have yet to meet a straight black man. Say no to a beautiful woman. Solely because she has natural hair. It’s ridiculous. IMO

    I will say that. It does seem that Natural haired Black women seem more open to white men. So maybe. These women seek the attention more of non-black men. So they never acknowledge positive attention from Black men.

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  7. Teddy says:

    Joe, not every good looking, errr, I mean natural haired black woman with a white guy, was already natural when she got the guy. Really, I can not imagine a white guy being negative about girlfriend going natural, the dynamics are quite different In WM-BW than in BM-BW.

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  8. Danielle says:

    I think it’s ka good idea a lot of women haven’t even thought about the idea of keepin it real because they don’t see it. A friend of mine mentioned me doing so and 5 months later here I am giving it a try and liking it. I find if it’s introduced… People maybe never imagined there hair in its natural state… Then the idea can be accepted.

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  9. Alisha says:

    I have been told many times by black men, that I should straighten my hair. I am so tired with men in this world trying to put us down and lower our self-esteem and thinking straight hair is the best hair. For years, I straighten my hair just because I thought I had to look like all the other women. Now I embrace who I really am and my own people can’t support that.

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  10. Green says:

    Where I live black men like very much women with natural hair. My sisters and I rocked natural hair since day zero but recently my eldest sis decided to wear a straight haired weave. All the women in her evening class told her how beautiful she looked, while the men just looked and said nothing with vacant expressions on their faces. One black male friend said to her when he came to class “NO, NO, NO” out loud. He said “girl you is one ah de finest, best thing in this school with yuh natural look…..wha yuh do that for?” She took the weave out the next day. Just wanted to share that story.
    I think generally black men don’t care if a black woman’s hair is natural, ironed, or if she is wearing a weave. If he really likes the woman, he does not care. However, for some black men, a woman wearing her natural hair tells him volumes (positive) about the woman and he develops a kind of respect for her that is not to be compared with any.

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      1. Von Franklin says:

        Are you really proud of being volored sister?. Your commenting is unassuring. A black man in this country has been condictioned just like you sis to believe that our percepts of beauty is wrong . When i am force to see women killing the imagine a natural dark complexed woman for a seudo euro look.

        Love even women in europe that are of color done wear weaves.
        Don’t think black men don’t like natural looking black women, but also take in to consideration , this dude only saw weaved women all he’s life ultimately he will find comfort in it.

        No disrespect.
        Von harvey

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  11. Ange says:

    Mmmhhh, Being an African born Australian (South Sudanese to be more specific), i’ve almost been brainwashed to believe that our hair is not meant to be the texture, length and sometimes even the colour that it is! Growing up in Kenya, all the hair salons specialised in weaving, perms, braid extections etc…basically no one would go to the salon to get kinky twists and vice versa. A girl was seen to be more ‘stylish’, or better lookingif she had her hair straightened or weaved… (this colonial concept is often followed by the girl also being light skinned)

    Here in Australia now, there are thousands of African immigrants, and they are just as judgement to other Africans in regards to hair, skin colour, body shape. I recently got insulted by a relative when i attended my cousin’s wedding in my kinky twist outs.. She said in my native Nuer dialect when she saw, ‘And who is this scavenger!?’ almost with disgust. Not 1 girl at the wedding wore their hair in it’s natural state, and only a small percentage of the attendees had not bleached their skin . I cannot wait to see the day when my people will learn that we are beautiful just he way we are, that there is no such thing as ‘good hair’, or good skin. Our hair really is the only thing that makes us a race unique, it differentiates us from all other races. And our skin, this sometimes darker than brown beautiful skin of ours is treasure for no other race can achieve it’s richness (no matter how long they stay in the sun)

    Our men need to love us the way we are for the confidence we posses today is the same we’ll imprint into our children. We need a future of confident brothers and sisters and we cannot feel this confidence when we are put down everyday by our own people. Stay true, stay black, stay blessed

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    1. Von Franklin says:

      Wow … Good eyes you most into marketing or so sort of advertising… The perception of the dark people on north americanis an two side on, on the first side is us (dark folks) being percieved as hoodlums,colored youngest accepting the title of a thug and young females of color be called and even calling them selve bitches and hoes.

      America has set the dogs out on the dark race of these country, yet black folks are doing a damned good job at showing our foolish side. As a people we fuel these perceptions

      Yet the damage is done even if you haven’t come from the “hood” like my self .
      you don’t have to wake up to a forty and a blunt, and your car, house, and mortage is in yo name.

      Even with that the world community view dark folk, colors,blacks , African Americas of any Negros the same way like Niggers..
      Places like India and Mexico make me wonder are we in 1804 still?….

      My bad for going so hard love

      Von Harvey

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  12. I am 16 and for the most part, I don’t think Black men like natural hair on Black women. That is why they always go for a light skinned girl with ”good”, permed or a girl with a weave. I wear my hair natural under the weave I am wearing. I like how it looks on me but I really wish I wore my natural hair because my hair is long when it is blowdried and it has a lot of length and it is thick. I should wear my natural hair from now on.

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    1. yes, you do whatever you feel is right for you. I think natural hair is beautiful, but I agree it is not appreciated. In this white supremacist/eurocentric culture natural kinky/afro hair is still seen as unattractive, but the truth is its extremely beautiful and UNIQUE to us. we are the only group on the earth that has such luscious and versatile hair. Kola Boof says we have the hair we have because it the “proof” that God put on us as the descendants of the original man/woman who lived in the first garden, which was in africa.

      Our hair very versatile, we can do so many styles that other people can’t really do cornrows, twists, curls, strawset, perm rod, afro and if we want it straight all we have to do is get it blown out and run a flat iron on it, but no matter what no other race can ever replicate our hair texture.

      Straight (non-african type hair like on white/asians) is beautiful hair too, but our hair is so under appreciated, when in reality it’s very unique, beautiful and versatile, don’t let anyone tell you different.

      so appreciate your hair, it’s unique, but do what u want for YOU, no one else…thanks for commenting

      and check out this video for some inspiration:

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  13. Chanda says:

    Usually I don’t enter comments on blogs of any nature; however, in reading the postings above, some comments really resonated with me and I wanted to share my story. I have had a relaxer in my hair for as long as I can remember. I was always told that “Nappy ain’t cute”. So I made it my business to make sure I was in the shop as often as my pocket could afford. This was a part of my life routine. Big event coming up, make a beauty shop appointment. Business meeting/trip, make an appointment, friends for dinner, make an appointment, every seven days, make an appointment, you guys get the picture. I wanted to be sure my hair was as straight and bouncy as it could possibly be. Because you see, I thought this defined me in some way.

    I didn’t realize my dysfunctional thinking until my “White” husband asked me a question. He said, “Why do you do that?” I said, “What?” He said, “Why do you do that to your hair? Why do you spend hours on end at the beauty shop? Why do you feel you have to straighten your hair?” I have to tell you, the only immediate reason I could think of was “I want to look pretty for you”. He said, “Do you think straight hair in some way makes you prettier than you would be if you wore your hair in its natural state?” I said, “Of course” because (as I was always told) “Nappy ain’t cute.”

    As we continued the conversation, he said, “What makes “Nappy” so unattractive to you? What’s so wrong with being you?” After a long silence (trying to reason through it) I said, “I feel that society/media tells us subliminally, that straight hair is what is considered beautiful and if you don’t have it, then you are not considered attractive or you are less attractive.” He said, “Yes, I can see how you may take it that way, but the media predominately depicts white women in commercials, magazines, etc. and if they’re not white they are half white” So is that what you’re doing, trying to emulate white women or fit into some Eurocentric idea of beauty?” (You guys, this was the first time I had ever been challenged to logically think about it.) He said, “No matter how straight and/or long your hair is, or how beautiful and flowing your weave is, you are still black and looked upon that way.” In fact, you may be looked upon negatively because you are not self-confident enough to be proud of who you are. Stop trying to hide/disguise your natural beauty. You are a beauty in your own right. Not compared to other women, but in your own right! As he emphatically expressed “IN YOUR OWN RIGHT”! I felt tears fill my eyes.

    I took those words and thought about them for a long time and after about a year or so of serious contemplation, I finally decided to try it. I thought, after all, if it doesn’t work for me I can always get a weave. I have to tell you guys it is the most liberating thing I have ever done. An earlier poster said, “The only natural black women they see are with white men.” Well, I don’t know how true that is, but I can tell you my “White” husband has given me a gift that is truly priceless! Thank you my love.

    Good luck and well wishes to all of you that decide to let your natural beauty show.

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  14. Reblogged this on The Truth About Dating and commented:
    I’m on the journey to being natural and I havve quite a few natural friends. The discussion came up about black men and their thoughts about natural hair. This post is very insightful and definitely worthy of a reblog. I would love you hear your thought about this topic. Come on men, what are your thoughts?

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  15. Kat says:

    Recently I saw pictures of myself at 6 yrs old with coily soft tight curls down my back. At 39 Ive been relaxed, jheri curled, cut, shaved, dyed, fried and lyed to. Ive just recently taken out microbraids that I became addicted to because the man Im seeing likes “long hair” but lies and says he prefers my hair natural. Last month I took out my microbraids and am now sporting my curls. I get alot of compliments. This is my 4th year natural and Im trying not to let society dictate or make me change my mind about my hair. I recently moved from cali to las vegas and it seems all of the black women here are weaved or braided. Its a normal thing to see. The question of do men prefer weaves or natural hair?: I have to say that black men “appreciate” and “respect” natural hair but prefer that european look. this is just my perception due to who Ive dated. White men however love black women who wear their natural hair.

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      1. Hi Sisters, being a black woman I myself have always been natural all my life and love seeing beautiful BLACK natural women on the street, the bus and on the web, I visit sites to get hair style inspiration all of the time, although we wear our hair natural we still like to wear our beautiful cosmetics, that includes me (smile) that said, I like to invite you all to my avon store at http://www.youravon.com/goldenhoney for all of your cosmetics & beauty needs, mention this post and receive a free gift with your purchase. Bottom line we as a people need to be more supportive of each other all the way round, that encludes in business also, and if you’re going to purchase your cosmetics you might as well get them from another natural Sister just like yourselves. Stay Classy and Fabulous as Always.

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  16. Ash says:

    To be honest having straight hair is universal. Black women arent the only race that has curly hair you know. Why cant we all just wear our hair the way we want as long as its visibly clean, why should it matter. I think the real issue is taking care of people who are misfortunate on this earth instead of worrying about who should be in that video, who should wear their hair this way or dress that way, more energy should be focused on taking care of others.

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