Interracial Love Should Be About Love…Period.

Interracial relationships…hot topic…why it’s a hot topic…I’ll never understand…because ‘interracial’ sex, relationships, marriage,  etc…have been going on since before there were even set designations of ‘race’, and as long as the human race exists, interracial relationships will exist… it is nothing new.

Nothing new.

With that being said, in an ideal world people would truly be able to see eachother as equal human beings regardless of color, but we don’t live in an egalitarian, idealistic world…we live in the real world. For many people, color matters. Some people prefer their own color, some people prefer a ‘different’ color. Nothing wrong with a healthy preference, but let’s be real there is a difference between a preference and being hateful.

If you enter into a relationship for the wrong reasons or for hateful reasons (color aside) you are building a relationship based on false and deceptive values. These values will manifest themselves in your relationship and ultimately you’ll have to deal with the consequences of your own foolish values.

Why am I saying this? I have seen so many blogs, forums and videos where people use their interracial relationship as a ‘weapon’ and tool of hate against others. That’s not cool. You shouldn’t get into an interracial relationship…or any relationship to spite another person or group…I can’t tell you how many blogs I’ve read where a person in an interracial relationship will claim to be so open-minded and color blind and then turn around make the most degrading and gross stereotypes about their own race…


Love who you want to love because you love them…not because you have insecurity issues with your own color, not because you are trying to spite certain members of your own race… Just love the person because you love them…

There’s no need to degrade your own race as a justification for dating ‘other races.’

When you claim to be color-blind and open, but discriminate against your own race or any other group, you’re essentially corrupting the very principle that you claim to advocate. Being color blind and open means being color blind and open to ALL PEOPLE, not just one specific group and every other race, but your own.

Don’t say black women have attitudes, black men are no good, black women are ugly, black men are lazy and that’s why you prefer this race or that race. Don’t claim to be colorblind and open, when you can’t even stand your own race…clearly you’re not colorblind…


Just love the person you love…interracial love should be about love period…just like non-interracial love should be about love…period.

Please do not corrupt the right that Richard and Mildred Loving fought for by infusing so-called ‘color-blind love’ with blatant hate and racism. Don’t call yourself open-minded and color blind when you’re not, please. Respect all people and strive to uphold the principle that Mildred and Richard fought to instill in society, which is that you should be able to see people for who they are on the inside, not define people by who they are on the outside. This applies to all people.


18 thoughts on “Interracial Love Should Be About Love…Period.”

  1. I wish I could share this with my complication aka ex that I still cohabitate with. We got into a heated arguement because I made disparaging comments about his choice in new girlfriend because she was white, due to all the “Black women are….” & “Black people are…” statements he’s made in the 7 years that I’ve known him. He feels that I am just being bitter & hypocritical, since I’ve dated men from 5 out of 7 continents (Indigenous men of Antartica, Holla!) but I can’t get him to understand that I date men that I like because of some specific thing about them that’s great & it is NEVER the color of their skin. I don’t automatically think that if a man is black he is bad/cheap/unemployed/immature/etc, or if a man is white he’s gonna treat me better/pay for things/take me to nice places/etc, despite the sum total of my experiences with them, simply because I know the world is bigger than the circles I’ve traveled in to date.


    1. thanks for ur comments. Yes, it is difficult when you have these people who corrupt the notion of love, especially as it pertains to interracial relationships. interracial relationship are supposed to be about looking beyond color, not basing ur love solely off of color, that is my opinion anyway. I think color is such a superficial thing to base ur love on, even when ur in a same race relationship. I don’t date black men jsut because they are black, I date the individual because i like who they are, it just so happens that culturally i tend to have more in common with black men, so personality wise i tend to gravitate more towards them, but it has nothing to do with stereotype or their actual color because people are individuals. the same applies 2 dating outside ur race, i don’t rule any race out, even if i have a preference because people are individuals.

      in my opinion, ur roommate is setting himself up for dissapointment by believing that white or anything but black is automatically better. people are individuals and there a cools and fools in all races. if he is basing his attraction off of stereotypes, he is in for a rude awakening.


  2. I’m so glad I stumbled upon this post! I’ve noticed the same problem and it gives me pause. How can you claim to be color blind and open-minded and spew such ugliness about your own race–or other races, for that matter? Isn’t the whole point that we’re all free to choose, and race doesn’t really matter in the end? It’s the person inside?

    I also agree that having a preference for certain physical characteristics should not translate into hate speech that degrades or insults others who don’t fit into those guidelines. We’re all beautiful in our own way, and just because you don’t like someone’s dark skin or white skin or blue eyes or brown eyes or straight hair or curly hair doesn’t make it ugly/unattractive.

    For some people, being “open-minded” has resulted in a different kind of prejudice. So unfortunate.


  3. Thanks for this post. I totally agree with you. I am so tired of hearing black men and women saying disparaging things about one another. Why can’t a person date a non-black person without hating on black people at the same time? Love has no color so I can understand how a person could fall in love with someone outside their race. I fell in love with a man named David years ago when I was in college. He was kind, gentle, understanding, intelligent and attentive. I loved him not because he was white but because he was such a great guy. I didn’t have any issues against black men. I just like men. In fact, I fell in love with a wonderful black man a year after meeting David. Unfortunately, David and I didn’t become serious about one another. But I am grateful for having met him anyway. So no, I didn’t like David out of any hatred towards black men. Yeah, you hear people say that their love for their non-black spouses or partners is color blind but sometimes these same people put down blacks of the opposite sex on a regular basis. And yes, I agree that people should be realistic about interracial relationships. I am concerned when I hear blacks say that they want to date whites because ” white men (women) will treat you better”. People are people. And relationships have their challenges regardless of who you have the relationship with. So yes, I am for interracial relationships but mainly when it has to do with love, and not self-hatred or hatred of your own people!!


  4. hey thnx for that mure, i’m tired of hearing peopeling tilling me why you have black girlfriend you leave all cute white girls and you atruckt to black girl why that it’s so shame on you??!!

    i been asked my self why peopel hate that race, why i don’t ??
    i don’t know really why . in my place it’s rare to see black girl with white man, really whene i moved with her all the poepel look at us what a heel is doing look at here she is so black and he is so white he don’t deserve her, what a hell are you talking about she is a girl like you, or better than you, she have a milke heart that you haven’t $$$$.
    i’m still with her and i don’t really care what the athers openion.
    i m happy with her


    1. yes, people should not date people ONLY because of their skin color or because their skin isn’t a certain color. a preference is one thing, but just being mean is another thing. there’s no need to hate a specific race, there are people who are worthy of respect and dignity in all races and there are people who mean and disrespectful in all races.


    1. If you’re going to deal in stereotypes, you should probably remember the proverb about people who live in glass houses. A real man works hard. A real man pays the bills. A real man stays with a woman if he gets her pregnant. Have black men lived up to that standard? I’ll let you judge. White women who go for black men do so for a number of reasons – some of them think that black men are bad or mysterious. This is called “being a thug” not “being a man.”


  5. Hi! I found your blog while I was searching about Loving family. I’ve just discovered their story (I’m not from U.S.) and It’s really beautiful how they fought for their love 🙂 I read your post and I’m completely agree. I remembered an episode of ‘Moesha’ sitcom I watched many years ago. She dates a white boy. They go to a place “for whites” and they look bad at her, after that they go to a place “for blacks” and they also have problems… so they decide to end their relationship. I didn’t like that episode, but now thinking about Loving couple I get really upset about the message they sent… when this couple fought so much…

    This is the end of the episode…


  6. AMEN to that….love shouldnt be about color. BTW my husband isnt black but white and philipino. His parents came from the philipines after ww2. His sisters went thru problems growing up and didnt like their non white I have 2 black parents but my moms side has various phenotypes from light to cocoa with the original 2 parents (blacks could beat darwinism hands down)..we all came from Adam & Eve…


  7. Again another excellent post, Peanut.
    I am attracted to all races of woman. While I’m most attracted to black women no matter if she’s light skinned, dark skinned or anything in between. I simply don’t really care about the race of the woman when it comes to dating, as long as she loves me and treats me right.


  8. I’m a white man married to a beautiful black woman. We just celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary and still going strong!


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